I have something I would like to share with you today 🙂
It’s a story about community, disappointment and learning new things that you can apply all over your life where you see it fit.
Here it goes.
When I had my first baby, fourteen or so years ago, I was part of a yoga community in San Francisco. I had been doing prenatal yoga through my pregnancy where I had met other moms, and I had finally graduated to the postpartum classes when my baby was six weeks old.
I was excited.
My expectations were high.
I was finally going to start getting back into shape.
I was going to get my body back.
I was going to be that strong mom who did yoga with a smiling baby gazing at me as the pregnancy weight melted off me from all the zen and joy filled yoga and breastfeeding.
So that didn’t happen.
We get to the class, and my baby is not having it.
She wants to be held and nursed the whole time.
It wasn’t blissful.
I didn’t feel strong.
I felt frustrated, angry, disappointed and like a failure.
I didn’t get to do yoga.
I sat most of the class propped up agains the wall, sweating, crying and nursing my baby.
My first postpartum yoga class was nothing like what I had expected.
Then she appeared.
When we were wrapping up, the others were putting away their props, I was still sitting there holding my baby, sweating and crying quietly.
This mom, who I thought was the wisest and kindest being ever, came up to me. Her baby was a few weeks older than mine, and I wanted to soak up all her knowledge and wisdom. She sat with me and gave me a piece of wisdom that you are going to think is so silly, yet applied correctly will change your life. You can tweak it as it fits you in different situations.
She said, what saved her was getting an iPod. Remember, this was ten thousand years ago in tech gadgets. Don’t judge 🙂
She said when she needed a break and there wasn’t a big break to be had, she put her baby in the stroller or baby carrier, put on her headphones and listened to music as she walked her baby.
I don’t have to tell you all the benefits listening to music has, let alone moving your body and getting out of the house during those precious in-between days of early motherhood.
Putting on her headphones created a space for her that was just hers. She was still there for her baby, able to touch and keep eye contact when the baby was awake, and at the same time make that little time and space for herself to take care of what she needed, nurture her body, mind and soul.
This advice is invaluable. It’s not instead of a real break. It’s not either or.
It’s knowing that you can make that space for yourself as you are there for others. It’s finding the balance so that you have that energy to be and stay present.
Get your iPod and your earphones. Take a moment.