On New Year’s Eve 2019 I broke my leg, I didn’t need surgery, but it was broken in a way that had me in bed, not moving at all for six weeks. I was in confinement before we were all in lockdown. Such a hipster.
So I was in bed with my injury, very focused on not falling into the hole of depression, which I knew could happen. I was alone all day, and all night, my husband who had to take care of everything barely had time for all he had to do and my kids were busy with school and their thing, so it was pretty brutal, and lonely. I was scared and anxious. I had to use all the things I teach in pregnancy and parenting to cope and get through it.
As I started coming out of my bed, getting more mobile, even though it was very slow, I still am not completely recovered, the world started locking down because of Covid 19. Just as I was able to hobble around and starting to move my knee, ready to go to rehab, France went into lockdown.
Most of us know what that has been like, and I have to tell you, it was wobbly for us to get used to the distance learning and not seeing our friends, but we have found a lot of silver linings and good things about our new pace.
That’s mostly what it is, isn’t it. A new pace and a very strong pull to reveal and uncover people’s values. Who are your friend and your community really? What are their priorities? Their values? Do they align with yours? I know I have had some surprises I didn’t like. We will talk a lot more about some of the things that have come up in the next few weeks, but we have all more or less, been forced to, and had the opportunity to face ourselves, as we are. Many probably for the first time. Suddenly there is time, and space, and that can be both terrifying and amazing, right?
So let’s begin at the beginning. With our slower pace. How has that changed for you and your family? For us, I see how different we all are just in how we organically like to start our day. I like to get up early, do my morning routine of exercise, meditation and shower before starting to help the kids with distance learning, and do my work. I wake up hungry but prioritize my morning routine and eat breakfast late. My daughter is the same. She gets up early, works out and showers before her first morning class. She is very focused and has a great routine that is her structure. We have very strong enneagram one tendencies. My youngest son bounces out of bed early, goes straight to have his breakfast and join his school calls. No fuss. My middle son likes to take it very slow in the morning. He joins his first class before he has breakfast, I realize now that he is much more of an evening person than a morning person. He gets into his day slowly. My husband loves his sleep and sleeps as late as he can, then juggles a million things before he settles down to have breakfast after everyone else. The boys and I spend a lot of time together, share all our meals and share the same work space and we have settled into a new pace.
When we all get to choose, our paces and our rhythms are different, they fit together, but they are not the same. So now that we don’t all have to be ready to get out the door at the same time, rushing to beat traffic to get to school on time, we have so much less stress. That is the first silver lining. The first week or so of distance learning was definitely wonky, but as we have found our pace it is so much less stressful. No feeling stressed and anxious in the morning, especially for my teenager who was always stressed leaving for school, and no prescriptive order to a blanket way of doing things in the same order for people whose rhythm is not the same has been wonderful.
So I invite you to do the same. Look at just your mornings. How have they changed? What can you observe from them? What do they reveal about your family members? When you really think about it, are you doing the things you want to do, are you prioritizing the things that make you feel good? Let me know, I would love to hear from you 🙂
During the lockdown and quarantine I have worked on a lot of things for my clients, and for you. A brand new iteration, the ten year anniversary of the Mamatoto Pregnancy and Birth course is live, and so is a Prepare for Homebirth course for all the moms who are looking for alternatives to birthing in the hospital during the pandemic, for any number of reasons. We have new parent groups, several new programs for both you and your kids that I will tell you more about next time.
For now, stay home, stay safe and spend some time thinking of all the goodness your morning routine brings you. Thank you for spending some time with me today.